STALKED Part 1
My name is Dawn Hillyer, I’m the Founder and Owner of HidingHilda, LLC. Below is the true story of life with a stalker, police interactions, the trial and life after he gets out of prison. I’ve heard from several women across the company having the same problems with getting help. It’s time to shed a light and increase awareness and response to those in similar situations. Laws need changed. I’m not telling my story to be vindictive or make the police response look bad. It is simply what happened.
**This is my story of how I was stalked for over 5 years. Please note that some details in this blog may be hard to read. This blog contains foul language and sexual content. Readers discretion is advised.**
STALKED PART 1 of 5
I was a recruiter for a local staffing firm for 10 years. A divorced mom with 3 kids, living and loving life. Every other weekend the kids went with their dad and I enjoyed my free time. I met a man named Michael McClellan at work. He was a stockbroker at a brokerage firm I was staffing for at the time. We started talking on Match.com. He was smart, charming and professional and we seemed to hit it off right away. We hung out on my free weekends, both of us taking a break from the “dating scene”.
No talk of love, no talk of future, no overnights with the kids, no mixing our day to day lives. Just…. Company. He was respectful, lived in a nice home, drove a nice car, always paid, and we both agreed it was a ‘for now’ thing. I mean what could go wrong. There were red flags, but nothing I couldn’t look past for the short term.
During our time as friends, he told me he was adopted and had Italian roots. Even fancied himself as an Italian “mobster” to a degree. Now this is where I began to notice some red flags. Keep in mind his last name is McClellan but on occasions, he used the last name Martarano (an Italian Mob family in Jersey he claimed he was related to). He would order pizza under other fake names then pick it up at the bank across the street instead of at his house. His car, his home, etc.. were all in someone else’s name – weird things like that.
One big thing I should have paid attention to was his rule of thumb. This was his 11-month rule he lived by. “If you want revenge against someone who did you wrong, you do it 11 months after whatever happened. It’s far enough away that they’ve moved on, yet close enough for them to wander if it’s you.” His other rule was to never trust a guy in a turtleneck. I thought he was just trying to show off – Like I said, we agreed this was short term so, whatever. I took it all with a grain of salt. Never in a million years did I think he would apply his rule to me, but I was so wrong.
After a short amount of time together and some slightly concerning red flags, we both decided we were ready get back on the dating scene and parted ways. Easy Breezy. He went away, no harm no fowl, no hurt feelings. I didn’t see or hear from him – until…11 months later. He was back. It all started on my way home from a Rolling Stones concert with my then new boyfriend L. Mike was the furthest thing from my mind. My phone started ringing and I received several texts. Finally, on the 26th call, I picked up.
I’ll try my best to be open and honest. I’m sure I’ve forgotten some things, but here it goes. Embarrassing parts and all!
The best way to see the progression is through the timeline of events.
**All can be verified in court records, phone logs, videos, and testimony. Some names have been changed to protect their identity. Please be advised, strong language is used throughout this blog.**
OCTOBER 12TH 2006
Out of the blue – on my way home from a concert with boyfriend (L) – I received 26 phone calls and several text messages from Mike. It was urgent he talk to me. He had something to show me and needed to come over right away. My answer? NO. He showed up at my home later that night anyway demanding to come in. I was shocked to hear him insisting he found a “fake identity” on me. He marched over to my computer, put his thumb drive in, and tried to show me. This quickly turned into how much he missed and loved me and wanted to be together. My answer again? “No. Please leave my house.” He finally left.
OCTOBER 15TH 2006
88 phone calls between 9:20am and 11:04pm. 123 total calls that day. Every phone call went unanswered. That day I also received multiple long rambling love letters through email, he dropped off gifts at my house and work, left me voice mails, and sent texts all day long saying he knows we should be together, we’re perfect.. blah blah blah…
Imagine someone calling back to back to back to back…. Back then, you couldn’t block the number. Maddening. My phone quickly became useless to me and a weapon for him.
OCTOBER 17TH – 26TH 2006
By now I have received HUNDREDS of phone calls, emails and text. He was still showing up at work and my home. If he knew I was home he would honk the horn on his car until I came out, wanting to say goodbye and letting me know I can always come back to him. Still delivered gifts to both my home and work. Trying to tell me the guy I’m dating now can’t compare to him and what we could have. He even delivered a CD he made of himself I was supposed to share with my friends so they could see how much he loved me and so they would help convince me we should be together. It went into the drawer with all the other crazy.
***When we finally watched it before trial it was 45 minutes long. The “Love CD” – It really shows the crazy and his state of mind. He admits to coming on like a “freight train”.
Again “NO!”. Very clearly, in person, every time he showed up. My answer was always “no”.
OCTOBER 26TH 2006
That evening while I was watching TV with L at my home, I get a knock at the door. Upon opening it, Mike barges in declaring his love. Challenging L in every way. Physically and emotionally. “No one’s love can compare to mine” he shouted. I yell at him to get out and pick up the phone to call the police. He leaves. After I threaten to call the police, things began to change. He became more agitated.
Needless to say after that, my relationship with L didn’t last much longer.
OCTOBER 27TH 2006
The following day I received yet again, an astonishing amount of calls. 56 to be exact. Calls of him begging me to come back. All hours of the day, non-stop. I’m still ignoring ALL of these and by me ignoring him, he starts to get very angry in emails. He doesn’t understand. Why won’t I take him back? I finally decided to reply to one of his hundreds of emails to tell him no. I wanted to be very clear to him and also so I would have it documented that this is NOT what I want.
I’m not scared at this point. I’m annoyed, I feel harassed, and confused why this is the world’s worst breakup for him when we weren’t even dating to begin with. I needed him to stop. This is now getting in the way of my job and my life in general.
OCTOBER 28TH – NOVEMBER 4TH 2006
28 Calls. He came by work twice. I got emails stating things like “Why didn’t you leave your porch light on?” and “I saw his wallet on your table” or “I’ve been watching you from the parking lot across the creek from your work.”
At this point, I’m starting to get creeped out and a little concerned but mainly still just very annoyed with his behavior. I was a little nervous but I kept myself calm with the thought “He’s just taking this really hard. Nothing will come of it and it’ll blow over soon if I keep ignoring him.”
*I’ve learned that bad guys will often tell you what they are going to do, it’s just a matter of if you’re listening to them or not. As seen below.*
OCTOBER 31st 2006
I was at an Ingram Hill concert in Chicago with my girlfriends. A much-needed weekend away. Now I can’t prove this, but I wholeheartedly believed Mike followed us to Chicago. We saw him on the highway a couple times on the way there and he makes mention that it was a coincidence and he wasn’t following us. Nothing happened besides the normal emails and calls he has been bombarding me with but still, creepy.
NOVEMBER 4TH 2006
Mike followed me home with Champaign in hand for yet another, last goodbye. He told me he was moving to Florida and getting married to a wife he had purchased. What? Ok, I didn’t believe him, but whatever it took to get him out. And hey, maybe he would really move! I mean how many times does he have to say goodbye? Leave already!
NOVEMBER 7TH – 8TH 2006
3 days of silence, peace, and relief. Finally, he’s gone. Life is normal, and I can put my mind to rest.
So I thought.
Nope, he’s still here. Great. 54 back to back phone calls between 11:03 and 11:52pm. Then 30 more calls the next morning. Emails and more emails. Just when I thought I could see the light at the end of the tunnel, things start getting worse. And by worse, I mean CREEPY! This is where he takes it to a new level. As I sit at my desk at work an email came up. It’s from him (eye roll). Again, I’m annoyed. Until I open the email. It’s pictures of the inside of my house. HE’S INSIDE MY HOUSE! Instant fear came over me. I immediately call the police to make the first report. By the time I got home with my children, he was still there. I told him to leave and called the police and reported him again.
The police came and he left but 10 minutes after the police left, he was back. I tried to keep him in the garage. My only thought was “my kids are inside.”. I yell at my 7-yr. old to call the police. So he did. Meanwhile, his 4-year-old twin brother and sister were sound asleep.
So here’s how that went down. The dispatcher kept asking my son to check on me in the garage – that was mistake #1. Every time my son came in to check on me, it only made Mike angrier.
Finally, after what felt like hours but was only a few minutes, 4 patrol cars show up. Keep in mind 2 had just left 10 min ago. The officers tell him to quit harassing me. Turns out he had a suspended Drivers license and weed in his pocket, but the officers decided the best thing to do was to let him call a friend to come get him and LEAVE HIS CAR IN FRONT OF MY HOUSE FOR HIM TO COME BACK AND GET! WHAT?! No thank you officer, but that’s what they decided. That was mistake #2.
Sure enough, he comes back to get his car. With every door locked, I hold my kids tight ready for the worst. The second we saw the headlights from his BMW shine in the window, we held our breath ready to call 911 again. Luckily, he didn’t bother us again that night.
NOVEMBER 9TH 2006
The next day I finally got Protective Order – after being turned away because I didn’t have his birthday and address! So, I’m supposed to drive bye my stalkers house to get his address – and what – call him for his birthday? Are you kidding me! I’m already nervous as hell, I mean what will he do when he gets it! I went back to the car and called one of the officers that was at my house the previous night. I begged him to give me the info so I could go back in and get the order. He did, so I marched right back in and got it.
Back to, what will he do when he gets it?
On the way home I changed my phone number and my personal email address. This whole time he was emailing both my work and home address. I could only change my personal one.
Your first question while reading this might be “why did I wait so long to report him?” Well I didn’t want to ruin the guys life. I just wanted him to LEAVE ME ALONE! He kept stating he understood and said kept saying his goodbyes. I really wanted to believe him. It was hard to imagine any of this could happen to me and thought if I kept ignoring him that he would eventually go away. I mean why on earth would you want to be with someone that doesn’t want to be with you? That, and I was way too nice. I’m embarrassed now that it took me so long.
NOVEMBER 10TH – 16TH 2006
With a little bit of a break from all of the crazy, I have time be with my kids, get a little work done, and had a little comfort in the fact that I had a protective order. I can sleep at night again. Until…
NOVEMBER 17TH – 19TH 2006
Calls and emails started back up. How did he get my new number?? I start seeing him in parking lots, gas stations, by my house, down the street, and on the street behind my house. It made sense to call the police again. I gave them the PO (protective order) and all the new emails I received. The police called Mike and told him to leave me alone, and that there was a PO in place. Mike said he said he understands. The police advice to me was to turn off my phone and email. That afternoon I got an interesting call. It was Mikes friend Bobby and his wife. Bobby was a police officer. I guess after I filed another report against him, Mike went to Bobby.
They were calling to try to get me to drop the PO. They didn’t want me to ruin his career. I told him he had to stop. The call ended up being 47-minutes long trying to reason with them (and Mike on the phone), but not backing down. Bobby needed to get him to stop. Nothing else had worked. I thought maybe if I could show Bobby how crazy Mike was acting, he could help. The police and eventually the jury had questions/problems with that call. They couldn’t understand why after all that time I tried to reason with Mike and Bobby. I was desperate for him to stop. Their questioning of me made me feel like they were looking for reasons to blame me. Like I lead him on. I did not expect that…
NOVEMBER 20TH 2006
Mike ‘officially’ receives the PO Paperwork (according to testimony), although he was referring to it and knew all about it the day I went to the courthouse to get it. Furious, he then emails the owner of the company I worked for as well as my direct boss telling them how awful they are ‘on my behalf’. Clearly trying to get me fired.
NOVEMBER 21ST – 22ND
36 Calls and more emails DEMANDING I drop the PO. I call the police, the officer calls Mike and AGAIN explains the PO, and to leave me alone or charges will be filed. Police advice was to turn off my phone and email. Thanks, because that seems to be working.
The police seemed annoyed with the situation, but I’m getting scarred. Everything is getting more and more aggressive. I have kids I have to think about. This isn’t just me in the situation, there is three kids involved as well. Once he learned I hadn’t yet dropped the PO, he filed a false police report against me. What?! What on earth could he have filled against me? Get this, he told police that I was violating the PO by calling him.
He created 92 false text messages that he said were from me. He would get on his computer online, create a text with my number (you could do this back in the day on flip phones) and then send himself text messages making it look like I was blowing his phone up! I couldn’t go home. I had to send my kids with their dad, and I stayed at a friend’s. He’s coming on like a freight train. He’s lost his mind and now, the police don’t know who to believe. This is a nightmare.
I decide to go to a concert with my friends who I haven’t seen since this madness started. I hadn’t been out in a long time and I didn’t really want to go but, I needed to get my mind off this. After my friends spent hours convincing me that I should go, I finally said OK. So off we go.
I was enjoying my time with my friends at the concert. My mind veered away briefly from everything going on until out of the corner of my eye I see him. Mike’s here. He quickly approached me and cornered me at the bar, threatens to kill me and tells my friends to enjoy their time. My friends pull him away as did a number of random strangers there and call the police. He was escorted out. Another report filed. Witness statements taken. This time they give me information on Victims Assistance and recommended I contact them, which I did immediately. I spoke with a nice lady with all the info and evidence in hand. She also called him. Police advice was to turn off my phone and email (again, thanks.).
Instead of leaving and walking into the open unguarded parking lot or getting a ride home to where he knows I live, I stayed with security until the concert was over. I felt it was the safest place to be. Later on you’ll learn the jury didn’t like that. They assumed I stayed and partied.
NOVEMBER 26TH 2006
The multiple calls from the police and the lady from the victim’s assistance telling him to back off and leave me alone, were clearly being ignored by him. Emails were sent to everyone in my company trying to get me fired. He also started using alias emails and speaking in 3rd person. Another Police Report and went to Victims Assistance again with the updates. Victims Assistance tells me she is going to turn the case in to the Detective with the county. Mike received another phone call telling him to leave me alone or he will end up in jail. I got another helpful recommendation from the police to turn off my phone and email. Sounds familiar.
NOVEMBER 26TH – DECEMBER 13TH 2006
More calls, emails, a drive-by or two, parking lot stalking, and ultimatums to drop the PO. This time all from different email addresses. Now he’s trying to cover his tracks.
DECEMBER 13TH – 21st 2006
1st appointment with 1st detective. I gave all phone records, emails, etc… Detective interviewed Mike. According to transcripts of the interview, During the interview the detective asked if Mike was ready to stop this nonsense. Mike said “I’m not a threat, I want to help her. I will be there to help her someday. You can’t stop me. The sheriff can’t stop me”… laughs, ran his fingers through his hair, leaned back in his chair, and says “but probably should.’
Transcripts also show he had been in trouble in the past. DWS, check deception, theft, intimidation, and another PO. The 7-page transcripts tell a delusional story of what was going on. Both in the past and the present. It still floors me. He also turned in 92 text messages he created on his computer to look like they were from me. 92!
*YIKES! You should see this video of the interview, it’s appalling! YES it’s all on video!!
Within a few weeks both the Detective and Victims assistance stopped returning my calls and totally dropped it.
Things still continued at Full force, all hours of the day and night… It was…. Ugghhh. The only solution from police was to again, turn off my phone and email. I’m a single mom with 3 kids and a sales job… not an option.
DECEMBER 21ST 2006
The date of the PO hearing has arrived (of course he appealed the PO). I was terrified and nervous. All the feeling you could I have I felt. I was scared to see him, to tell the judge everything that was going on. All of it, terrifying. I had no idea what to expect.
He shows up with his friend Bobbie who happened to be a Police officer in uniform, as well as with another “friend” and that friends’ newborn baby. He looked like a nice, family oriented, good guy. (engage another eye-roll emoji). I went with my parents. Despite all the evidence, police reports, emails, and text messages, the magistrate denied the PO. I was floored and speechless. I could not believe that just happened. Tears filled my eyes.
I’m losing hope that this is ever going to end. I started crying in court asking the judge “what am I supposed to do?” He instructed me in open court to come back if I receive any contact at all from him. When we left, he was waiting outside the courthouse doors for me. With my head down and my parents beside me, I walked fast to my car. He’s yelling at me while I cross the street. ”See you soon” he says. By the time I got home… I had 2 emails. The next day, I went back and got a new PO.
DECEMBER 22nd – 23rd 2006
With a new PO in hand, I decided to venture out to a local bar with my friends I haven’t seen since this started. It used to be my (not his) regular Friday night afterwork hangout. Not long after I was there, he showed up and he was pissed. He walked up to my table, slammed his fist down in front of me, yelling at me, calling me names, and making a scene. My friends immediately got between us and Mike was ready to fight them. I grabbed the PO, showed the security on duty and he was kicked out. – Another police report filed. Provided again, all the emails, phone records etc. along with all the new ones. Another phone call to him from authorities, another confirmation of the PO’s, another recommendation to shut off my phone.
After he got kicked out, the text messages started rolling in. Disgusting texts. Be advised, these are bad – and NOTHING like this ever happened. My Dad is a great man – he would NEVER.
***DISCLAIMER* Readers discretion is advised as the following messages are R rated. Read at your own risk***
SERIOUSLY – WHYYYY won’t the police help me?? You can’t do this to people! I do not understand why I can’t get help with this lunatic!!!
Morning of DECEMBER 23RD 2006
No sleep all night. I’m in constant agony. The next morning I get several calls from Mikes number- didn’t answer. Then I get a call from a different number that left a message. It was a police officer. He left a message regarding a report filed by Mike – he was standing there with him looking at all the text messages I supposedly sent him. They were death threats made to look like they were from me. The officer stated he knew there was a PO and I needed to stop contacting Mike or he would take ME TO JAIL over Christmas weekend. – I made ANOTHER police report. Then a couple hours later there was a knock at my door, more police, it seems Mike requested a wellness check – “I was hyped up on cocaine and threatening suicide.” I filed another report against him– same results.
How can the judicial system be failing me this hard!
Emails from fake address continue and more…
JANUARY 11TH 2007
Another PO hearing – he appealed again, and this time however it was granted in open court. Yay, Finally! I Immediately changed my cell phone number and email address as soon as I left court. The celebration had started. I won. Finally. Freedom.
3:00 AM… my home phone rings. It’s Mike.
Now it really begins. If you thought the beginning was bad, wait to you hear the rest!